In defense of Twitter

30 03 2009

Recently, a colleague stopped following me on Twitter because, he says, keeping up with my feed is “emotionally exhausting.” Others have panned the practice as banal, self-indulgent, time-consuming or narcissistic. And then there’s this video, which successfully, and hilariously, paints Twitter as absurd in the extreme:

All of these folks make good points. And, as most who know me are aware, I am nothing if not banal, self-indulgent, time-consuming, narcissistic and otherwise emotionally exhausting—but that’s me, not Twitter. Twitter itself is nothing more than a medium I use to disseminate my narcissism, banality, etc., and like all other media, it can be used well or it can be used poorly.

When used poorly, you get the Twitter described above. But when you use it well, Twitter becomes something more than yet another social networking site; namely, a real-time, collaborative mental sketch pad that allows the user to take an idea, throw it in the hopper, and see what comes back. At it’s best, Twitter isn’t about getting to know each other so much as it is about sharing ideas, shaping a larger dialogue and watching the cultural zeitgeist develop in real time.

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Friday Freakshow

27 03 2009

No jokes, no commentary, just this guy:

yikes





Steve Harvey wishes you weren’t such a slut

25 03 2009

So I was browsing through Oprah.com yesterday, for, uh, RESEARCH PURPOSES ONLY, and I came across O’s interview with one of the original Kings of Comedy, Steve Harvey. Being someone who occasionally likes to “laugh” at “jokes,” I thought the Harvey piece would be right up my alley.

Oh, my.

Turns out our friend Steve fancies himself as something of a social commentator. And you know his favorite thing to offer commentary on? Women. Specifically, Steve was on Oprah to share with us his pearls of wisdom regarding how ladies ought to behave.

Harvey’s first book, “Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man” currently tops the New York Times best seller list in the advice category, and Oprah, apparently, is lapping it up. According to Harvey, whenever a man approaches a woman, he knows what he wants from her and is trying to determine what it’s going to cost him—a premise that’s hardly revolutionary. In fact, I’m fairly certain I’ve heard it somewhere before.

 

What a dick!

The problem, Harvey says, is that modern women “have stopped setting the bar high.” You sluts are basically giving it away for free. And because, according to Harvey, a gal’s vagina is pretty much all she brings to the table, by giving it up, you’re giving away all your power. Steve is just looking out for you, see.

For reasons that aren’t entirely clear, though, Harvey isn’t comfortable calling sex sex. Instead, he calls it a “cookie”: “We’ve got to have a cookie. Everybody likes cookies. That’s the thing about a cookie. I like oatmeal raisin…but if you’ve got vanilla cream, I’ll eat that too.”

Honestly, I don’t even know what that means.

And how long does Harvey think a lady should wait before giving up her “cookie”? Three months. Months. Look, I’m all for taking things slow if that’s what you feel like you want to do. Fine. Good. But 90 days? I’m a lady, Steve, not a saint.

Of course, Harvey says, you can put out the cookie platter before then, but only at the risk of looking “desperate.” “You all keep changing the rules,” Harvey writes. “And men are aware of the fact that you are changing the rules. We’re aware of the fact that you act desperate. We’re aware of the fact that you think there’s a good shortage of good men out there.”

The flaws, insults and outright misogynies in Harvey’s argument are both too numerous and too obvious to outline here. But it all goes back to the idea that sex—I mean, the “cookie”—is the only thing a woman has to offer that a man could possibly be interested in. Which, when you think about it, is degrading to men maybe most of all.





The sartorial equivalent of ‘I have a headache’

25 03 2009
lame

Listen up, ladies! We might be in a recession, but everybody’s favorite shrieking loon Elisabeth Hasselbeck has come to our rescue with a new line of “pretty and polished separates” available for purchase via your very own tee vee machine!

Cut from fashionable polyester and starting at just $44, Elisabeth’s roomy tops and quirky capris are perfect for every occasion, from carpooling to Bunco night to restricting access to contraceptives.

Plus, because the line is only available via notorious craphawker QVC—shit, they let a drunken Paula Abdul on the air—you will have more adorably vacant Hasselbecky goodness beamed into your living room than ever before.

You’re welcome, America.





Too Big to Fail FAIL

23 03 2009

 

This commercial—originally aired during the 2004 Athens Olympics—would be tragic enough on its own. But I think the worst part about this entire AIG mess is that I just don’t feel like I can trust Abbey Bartlet anymore.

 

 

More fun AIG commercials after the jump for you to watch while you drink/cry/cut yourself. (All the videos are from YouTube; the page on AIG’s site where they were featured seems to have mysteriously disappeared.)

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Office kitchen wars, take three

20 03 2009

dishes

The vigilante crackdown on disgusting kitchen slobs continues. This is a bit hopey-er than my guillotine, but I feel like Barack’s expression is a bit menacing. As if he’s saying, ‘Don’t make me tell Michelle about this.’





A question on comments

18 03 2009

As maybe you’ve noticed, I don’t post comments on my own blog. Sometimes I’d like to, to clarify a point I made, respond to another commenter or just verbally bitch-slap somebody who I feel like is being sort of a douchebucket, because, you know, I’m not above that. But I don’t because I feel like it’s not really fair. I have a lot of leverage here in my little corner of the internet: I can state my opinion, cherry-pick my facts, even delete comments if I want to (which I never have. Yet.). So I feel like sticking my nose into the comments section would be, forgive the expression, a sort of bitch-ass thing to do.

Which brings me to my question: Do you think bloggers should post comments on their own blogs? What makes it appropriate/inappropriate? Why?

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